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MISCmedia for 3/20/00
It's An X-Treme World

IT'S SPRING EQUINOX TIME at long last.

And around these parts, that's come to mean one primary thing--the imminent end of snowboarding season and the associated "X-treme" marketing loudness.

But each year, that relief seems to come later and later. I won't be surprised if it eventually goes year-round, with fake-snow machines spewing forth human-made slipping and sliding stuff for the soft-talking, hard-playing dudes 'n' dudettes.

Of course, X-treme hype goes on all year round anyway.

It's come to cover not only those athletic activities invented during the years the name's been in use, but also older activities such as surfing and skateboarding. Anything involving individual athletes (preferably male; preferably just barely old enough to sign their own contracts) proving themselves in grandstanding, gravity-and-common-sense-defying stunts.

Activities that can be turned into context-free images of near-superhuman achievement, for the selling of soda pop, cereal, cars, energy bars, Ore-Ida Bagel Bites, etc. etc.

This ultimately corporate marketing iconography devolved from what had once been celebrations of individuality, of rebellion against the squaresville realm of organized sports (particularly team sports).

But that's something you all should've expected from the start. (Precedent: The original re-imaging of surfing from something vaguely rebellious into the milieu of Frankie and Annette.)

Slightly more improbable is the role "X-treme" marketing played in the mainstreaming of punk rock during the middle of the previous decade. The music that, for nearly two decades, symbolized the near-ultimate in uncommerciality suddenly became soundtrack music in sneaker commercials.

Whole books, or at least whole masters' theses, could be written about this transition. How high-school punk rockers used to be the scrawny ones, the unathletic ones; but then their freaky-geeky little subculture got taken over by jocks and ex-mullet-heads.

Other full-length works could be written about how the sports themselves, once tightly-knit subcultures of relative egalitarianism (or at least meritocracy) became, under the corrupting influence of sponsor bucks, into annexes of the mainstream sports universe complete with celebrities, endorsement deals, and star/spectator dichotomies.

Snowboarding participants of my acquaintance insist to me they don't bother with all that advertising-related image crap. While some of these folks enjoy the equipment shows, videos, and promotional events corporatization has brought to the sport, they insist it's still fundamentally a DIY, make-your-own-fun scene if you want it to be.

I have a hard time explaining to these folks another, more insiduous aspect of the corporatization--how it's redefined these sports, even on the individual-participant level, in corporate-friendly ways.

It's a whole X-treme world these days. The corporatized image of X-treme sports meshes perfectly with the X-treme-ized image of business. Today's CNBC and Fast Company heroes are self-styled "rebels" who (at least in the business-media fantasies) "break all the rules," take "big risks," and turn into IPO gazillionaires while they're still young enough to snowboard.

There's nothing really all that extreme about X-treme anymore. It's not rebellious, and it offends nobody (except maybe some old downhill skiers).

Maybe the way beyond the X-treme hype is to acknowledge it's all square and mainstream now, but that you like to participate in it anyway.

To refuse to either blindly follow or blindly reject the sports' fashionability.

Besides, the marketers have already started planning for any X-treme backlash; as evinced by Nabisco Sportz crackers--which let armchair athletes get fat whilst ingesting images of old-style team sports gear.

TOMORROW: Bye bye Muzak.

IN OTHER NEWS: Artist Carl Smool's quasi-apocalyptic "Fire Ceremony" performance, postponed from New Year's, was finally held on a perfect mid-March Sunday night. The reschedule date was picked because it was the closest weekend date to the spring equinox. It turned out to be even more appropriate--the pagan New Year, for a vaguely neopagan rite. Giant effigies of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse were lit by fireworks and slowly burned away, followed by the centerpiece figure of a giant egg (with a figure of the mythical roc bird revealed inside). Thousands gathered for the under-publicized makeup date, and stood in shared solemn awe at the spectacle. It was the biggest gathering I'd seen at the Seattle Center fountain area for one shared experience since the Cobain memorial. Next Sunday, at sunrise instead of sunset, comes another rite of destruction which will signify a change of eras and which will be watched by thousands--the Kingdome implosion.

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